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Preparing for DivorceWhen preparing for divorce, emotions can feel as though they are on a roller-coaster. The key is learning to control them instead of them controlling you.  Whether you are the spouse who desires the divorce or you are reaping the consequences of your spouse’s decision, emotions are inevitably at an all-time high.  Before moving any farther, learn now how to get them under control so you can be emotionally fit to make the decisions needed for your post-divorce future.


Keep your story telling to a minimal when working with your divorce attorney.  Sure you will need to inform him about the details in the beginning but afterwards keep business minded with emotions aside.  Remember, your lawyer’s job is to get you a divorce, not to be your therapist.  It might be helpful to make a list of questions to ask and tasks to accomplish while at your appointment.  If a topic is addressed by your lawyer that tends to bring about emotions, you may want to address the facts about the topics and after the appointment address your emotions concerning it.  Information will need to be discussed in detail with your lawyer when preparing for divorce, but when you feel you need to share a story about every scenario then your emotions may lead your legal appointment.  This not only tends to limit the work accomplished, therefore, leading to additional appointments thus increasing your legal expense.


When preparing for divorce, emotions can range from anger, guilt, and even hopelessness.  Working through these emotions is a must in order to obtain a divorce agreement that benefits you currently and years after the ink is dry on your divorce decree.  The problem for many  is that they allow emotions to cloud their judgement and decision making skills.   Many individuals allow their anger to prolong their divorce as they are unwilling to work toward a successful resolution.  Not agreeing to acceptable offers from your spouse due to anger and not willing to contribute reasonable counteroffers only prolongs creating a successful divorce agreement.  Unwillingness to lay emotions aside to work toward informed decisions that will affect the remainder of your life can be detrimental. Creating a mental awareness that emotions are a part of divorce but not when it comes to appointments with your family lawyer or the decision making process is so necessary.


Instead of allowing your emotions to control your divorce take the energy from them to begin educating yourself about the divorce process, identifying your divorce goals, and how to make decisions which will help you to have a better quality of life after divorce.

Divorce is a journey that many do not understand making it an intimidating process.  Learning to control your emotions, becoming educated as to how to make informed decisions and working toward a divorce agreement that benefits all family members is vital to your success.  At Divorce Tool Box we understand the emotional process as well as how to get you emotionally prepared, educated for the journey and ready to work with your family lawyer.  Click here to learn more about how our web-based video series can help you.  

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