Any time a newspaper is opened, there is a section for obituary listings. The list includes the complete burial plan for each deceased individual which includes viewing and visitation time, memorial service date and time, cemetery for burial, etc.
Although death of marriage ranks very high in the grief process, usually there is no ceremony planned for the death of marriage, no mourners gathered to pay their respect, no cemetery listed to bury all the memories, pain, anger, frustrations, fears, insecurities, dreams, hopes, and anticipation of fulfilling the vows of “till death do us part”.
Most marriages are planned with anticipation of a long life together with children to parent until they are grown and then performing grandparent roles for the children born to their children. Almost no marriages are planned with the expectation of divorce.
No marriage is immune to divorce as it claims marriages of parents, relatives, friends, and even our children. Married couples form friendships with mutual friends, neighbors and many other acquaintances which often chose sides after the divorce and are not there to help grieve the death of the marriage. Others choose to disconnect from both parties and are not there to grieve the death of the marriage either. The loyal, reliable friendships made during marriage are not there and pain of betrayal causes much grief which must also be mourned.
The immediate family members are usually the only ones who mourn the death of a marriage as they experience this death personally. Family members are aware of the manifestations that resulted in the divorce and may be left to grieve the divorce alone.
Many times all individuals of divorce find the horror is more than they can bear as their “world” falls apart around them. They become aware that during their loneliness that they are able to “find” themselves again. Usually it is during this time they consider the effects of staying in a destructive marriage and realize that they can make a new life which would be much more productive.
When the marriage dies, relationships within the family and extended family also die. The only ceremony for the death of the marriage is usually a court hearing to decide the many facets which composed the marriage. The mourners consist of family members and court personnel as the final divorce decree is signed. The death of the marriage is buried when the ink dries on the final decree by the judges’ signature.
Once the burial of the marriage has ended and the grieving process lessens, an individual will learn to encompass life once again. A new life filled with happiness, compassion for others in the divorce process, and freedom to explore inner feelings.
Divorce Tool Box can assist through the death of your marriage. No one knows how you may feel through this death, but Divorce Tool Box online sessions can help you succeed. Our online sessions can help you through the grieving process toward self growth and you don't have to face divorce alone. Visit us today @ www.divorcetoolbox.com.